Various problems at home, work, until the child's misbehavior often makes you lose control and get angry. In fact, not infrequently, the children become the target of your anger, either by gesture or rude words coming out of your mouth. Be careful if you often let slip like this.
"Words can be a source of inspiration, but also may hurt feelings," said Chick Moorman, author of Parent Talk and Spirit Whisperers.
Even though your child cause many problems, as a parent you should not throw hurtful words for children. The effects of harsh words are often more harmful than you think. For example like this:
"If bad, I'll leave you here." Threaten and scare your children with the hope that they obey your command. As you know, the biggest fear of small children is lost alone and insecure. Therefore, the actions you leave it alone would cause trauma for him.
Even though your child cause many problems, as a parent you should not throw hurtful words for children. The effects of harsh words are often more harmful than you think. For example like this:
"If bad, I'll leave you here." Threaten and scare your children with the hope that they obey your command. As you know, the biggest fear of small children is lost alone and insecure. Therefore, the actions you leave it alone would cause trauma for him.
Instead of threatening and scaring children, it is better to say wish you well. For example, when a child whining for toys, just tell him, "Arka, if you keep whining like that, we're going home now. Naughty But if you do not, we will remain at the grocery store and pick together."
Another alternative is to take a break. Delinquency and anger may be a sign that you or your children need a break.
"You should be ashamed." Many parents think that by revealing this, the child will be embarrassed and will change its position according to what they want. However, young children can not understand the shame caused by mistakes done. Therefore, it is not necessarily immediately successful. If it is too often said this, then they will just think that everything he does is always wrong.
"If you never existed." This sentence has meaning: "My father and mother never wanted you." Therefore, this sentence should not be pronounced by the parents. It will be very painful, both for the child and for the others who heard it. Apart from the mischief that has been done the child, he will attend because you and your husband. So, be a responsible parent to care for and educate children well, instead of blaming him because he was born in the world.
"You are making my mother divorced." No child cause parents divorced. When the sentence was pronounced, then indirectly you make kids lifelong emotional burden. Even when you explain cautious about divorce, children will feel very responsible for your decision to divorce. Children would assume that if he behaved better, then you are not getting a divorce. Though unspoken by children, these problems often become a serious problem.
"Why do not you like the other brother?" Having said this, then it implies that you are comparing children with another brother that children are not smart enough, good enough, or quickly learn than his brother. Appellant also will increase the rivalry rise, who would destroy the relationship of brotherhood and develop detachment. Accept each child in your family because they have their own unique and distinctive. Help your child to see their privilege by focusing on each individual without using comparisons.
"Let Mother completion." Maybe, intentions to help resolve a difficult homework done. However, if too often do this, then you have taken over the work of children who should be doing themselves. It will weaken it even. Take over child labor may save you time in the present, but you leave the baggage in the future because the child so not used independently.
"I told you so, follow it." This sentence sounds like a loud command for children. However, the deepest meaning of this phrase is, "I am an adult, and your children," or "I'm smart, and you're stupid" or "I'm in charge, and you do not", or "I have a set, and you that should work. " Confirmation of this will create a gap between you and your child.
Style talk like this cause resentment in the child, perhaps even hatred and the competition to snatch power in the house. Try to use better language to express disapproval of the child so that they respect and understand what you are feeling.
"You should be ashamed." Many parents think that by revealing this, the child will be embarrassed and will change its position according to what they want. However, young children can not understand the shame caused by mistakes done. Therefore, it is not necessarily immediately successful. If it is too often said this, then they will just think that everything he does is always wrong.
"If you never existed." This sentence has meaning: "My father and mother never wanted you." Therefore, this sentence should not be pronounced by the parents. It will be very painful, both for the child and for the others who heard it. Apart from the mischief that has been done the child, he will attend because you and your husband. So, be a responsible parent to care for and educate children well, instead of blaming him because he was born in the world.
"You are making my mother divorced." No child cause parents divorced. When the sentence was pronounced, then indirectly you make kids lifelong emotional burden. Even when you explain cautious about divorce, children will feel very responsible for your decision to divorce. Children would assume that if he behaved better, then you are not getting a divorce. Though unspoken by children, these problems often become a serious problem.
"Why do not you like the other brother?" Having said this, then it implies that you are comparing children with another brother that children are not smart enough, good enough, or quickly learn than his brother. Appellant also will increase the rivalry rise, who would destroy the relationship of brotherhood and develop detachment. Accept each child in your family because they have their own unique and distinctive. Help your child to see their privilege by focusing on each individual without using comparisons.
"Let Mother completion." Maybe, intentions to help resolve a difficult homework done. However, if too often do this, then you have taken over the work of children who should be doing themselves. It will weaken it even. Take over child labor may save you time in the present, but you leave the baggage in the future because the child so not used independently.
"I told you so, follow it." This sentence sounds like a loud command for children. However, the deepest meaning of this phrase is, "I am an adult, and your children," or "I'm smart, and you're stupid" or "I'm in charge, and you do not", or "I have a set, and you that should work. " Confirmation of this will create a gap between you and your child.
Style talk like this cause resentment in the child, perhaps even hatred and the competition to snatch power in the house. Try to use better language to express disapproval of the child so that they respect and understand what you are feeling.
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